I am not okay. I need you but i shouldn’t. I want this to go away, all of it. I want you near me for the sake of being near me. I want to blow away with the wind tonight

…

oh… btw, we are having a romantic-comedy/mushy movie marathon so we can act like an annoying couple who loves eachother obnoxiously….

wishing you would call….

This is my last night being spent at Point Park… i am sad, but relieved also proud that I am now a sophomore at college, but scared of what the future entails. Tonight, I don’t want to leave. I have so much of me here and I don’t want to loose it. I cant loose it. my heart hurts. my head throbs. my voice cracks but my eyes remain dry. Home, isn’t a place, rather, a feeling. A feeling i miss very much. I have a bit of home in Pittsburgh, and i will leave here at point park, till the rest of my days.  I have experienced so many of my firsts happened here… as well as some of my lasts. 

I am so grateful for all of this. so very grateful.

i think i am going  crazy. I want to sleep and to scream and be with someone who wants to be with me, just to be. no frills, no nothing, just being. i am too tired to argue and to cry and to fight anymore, my summer starts now and all i want is to love and to be loved and to lay in the sand and to be.

just be.

(can you tell i’m on the verge of a mental breakdown)

I am changing faster then the seasons and I cant keep up

I dont know what I am doing anymore.

I love you, a thousand time over, to pluto and back, sea to sea, star to glimmering star, state to  coastal state, heart to heart, I love you more then I can ever begin to confess.

Just lying in my bed on a friday night, enjoying some time alone, and listening to the Plain White T’s… I forgot how much I love them. Its comforting to be singing along to old tunes that I used to and still enjoy so much… no matter how much I have grown, I can always resort back to the PWTS. They have never left me and has always played an influential role in my life. I am thankful for that. 

Alone time is good, heck, I love it a lot of the time. But tonight, I am over it. But at the same time, I want to be alone. I don’t know what to think of it.